There is a market that is sorely lacking in the clothing industry, and it is this: the items of clothing that one wears in the time immediately after having a baby. We know that the maternity clothing market has already upped its game, so we can leave that alone. I still remember being newly pregnant and excitedly pulling on my first pair of maternity jeans. What a fun time! As it stands now, I have a clear tub of maternity clothes in my closet, the sight of which brings sweet memories of anticipating the arrival of a new baby and waddling through the dessert line three times at a holiday party.
But also squished into that box is a ball of oversized sweaters and something reminiscent of pants that I wore in the months after having babies, the sight of which brings me pangs of regret and despondency. I mean, what else was I supposed to wear? Those maternity jeans? My husband’s jeans? Good lord why were all my pre-pregnancy shirts so tight?
So here is what I propose: a Stitch-Fix-like service that sends you a box of clothes for the immediate after-baby time that you wear for as long as you need before you send them the hell away and never have to look at again. It’s going to be called something sexy and mysterious like “Afterglow” because you will need every ounce of encouragement to get through this phase where you feel sort of like a walking waterbed.
Instead of measuring yourself for your actual size at this sensitive juncture in your life, you will just snap a picture and send it to a very empathetic stylist with the caption “do with this what you will” and in return you will get a box of stylish yet forgiving articles of clothing for the next few months/years. It’s going to need to consist of stretchy pants in black, some loose tops, lots of fancy-looking cardigans that are basically blankets disguised as clothing, and the obligatory conservative dress for That Important Thing your family insisted on scheduling five weeks after you had a baby. There will be one workout top because your stylist will have a sense of humor, also because you will need the right uniform to drop off your baby in the gym childcare and then just collapse in the nearest chair and stare off into space with a cup of black coffee (you could have ordered creamer but #tired).
So if you are interested in making Afterglow a reality, I’m happy to work with you and become co-billionaires like the lady who invented Spanx. Our cause is noble and the work will be plentiful, because all the sexy postpartum mommas out there are depending on us.